| To whom it may concern..... |
[14 Jan 2008|04:13pm] |
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... Does anyone even still read My journal?I'm on myspace now and if anyone from here has a myspace Id really like for you to add Me ...or vice versa,let Me know....
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| Liber AL verse 93 of the whole |
[23 Jun 2006|05:21pm] |
ok....so "....There is a great danger in Me ,for who doth not understand these runes shall make a great miss He shall fall down into the pit called because and there he shall perish with the dogs of reason"
um...yeah...no,pressure.
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| The Circle K is under renovation... |
[15 Jun 2006|06:14pm] |
Im giddy as a schoolgirl...well,ok....Im giddy....Papa critiqued My reading list and gave some VERY VERY VERY useful advice and direction.Another step closer to the prize ...as it were...ya know,the more I study the qlipoth and Daath the more I begin looking inward and find Myself asking "Why?" as in why am I so fascinated by this subject matter?why is it something I want to learn about?and perhaps thats the whole point....to know Myself maybe a little better.
My initial thought was perhaps Power....but no,power is a drawing card,and Magick a tease ,as the saying goes.Power is illusory and fleeting at best....perhaps wisdom?can wisdom be attained with out expierience and time?I dont know all the answers....yet...lol....I just know that there are people I admire,and wanna "be like when I grow up",follow in their footsteps and maybe make a few footsteps of My own .....maybe thats what some of this is about?growing up I mean....whos to say?...I just know that it'll be an interesting trip,hopefully with a few thrills an spills ...and maybe a sprinkling of notoriety thrown in...LOL.
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| The times,they are a changin..... |
[29 May 2006|10:54pm] |
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mood |
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mellow |
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music |
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Jay-Z - 99 problems |
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THEN: The Revolution Will Not Be Televised
You will not be able to stay home, brother. You will not be able to plug in, turn on and cop out. You will not be able to lose yourself on skag and skip, Skip out for beer during commercials, Because the revolution will not be televised.
The revolution will not be televised. The revolution will not be brought to you by Xerox In 4 parts without commercial interruptions. The revolution will not show you pictures of Nixon blowing a bugle and leading a charge by John Mitchell, General Abrams and Spiro Agnew to eat hog maws confiscated from a Harlem sanctuary. The revolution will not be televised.
The revolution will not be brought to you by the Schaefer Award Theatre and will not star Natalie Woods and Steve McQueen or Bullwinkle and Julia. The revolution will not give your mouth sex appeal. The revolution will not get rid of the nubs. The revolution will not make you look five pounds thinner, because the revolution will not be televised, Brother.
There will be no pictures of you and Willie May pushing that shopping cart down the block on the dead run, or trying to slide that color television into a stolen ambulance. NBC will not be able predict the winner at 8:32 or report from 29 districts. The revolution will not be televised.
There will be no pictures of pigs shooting down brothers in the instant replay. There will be no pictures of pigs shooting down brothers in the instant replay. There will be no pictures of Whitney Young being run out of Harlem on a rail with a brand new process. There will be no slow motion or still life of Roy Wilkens strolling through Watts in a Red, Black and Green liberation jumpsuit that he had been saving For just the proper occasion.
Green Acres, The Beverly Hillbillies, and Hooterville Junction will no longer be so damned relevant, and women will not care if Dick finally gets down with Jane on Search for Tomorrow because Black people will be in the street looking for a brighter day. The revolution will not be televised.
There will be no highlights on the eleven o'clock news and no pictures of hairy armed women liberationists and Jackie Onassis blowing her nose. The theme song will not be written by Jim Webb, Francis Scott Key, nor sung by Glen Campbell, Tom Jones, Johnny Cash, Englebert Humperdink, or the Rare Earth. The revolution will not be televised.
The revolution will not be right back after a message bbout a white tornado, white lightning, or white people. You will not have to worry about a dove in your bedroom, a tiger in your tank, or the giant in your toilet bowl. The revolution will not go better with Coke. The revolution will not fight the germs that may cause bad breath. The revolution will put you in the driver's seat.
The revolution will not be televised, will not be televised, will not be televised, will not be televised. The revolution will be no re-run brothers;
NOW:
You will not be able to stay home, dear Netizen. You will not be able to plug in, log on and opt out. You will not be able to lose yourself in Final Fantasy, Or hold your Kazaa download queues, Because revolution is not an AOL Keyword.
Revolution is not an AOL Keyword. Revolution will not be brought to you on Hi-Def TV Encrypted with a warning from the FBI. Revolution will not have a jpeg slideshow of Dubya Calling the cattle and leading the incursion by Secretary Rumsfeld, General Ashcroft and Dick Cheney Riding nuclear warheads on their way to Iraq, Or North Korea, or Iran. Revolution is not an AOL Keyword. Revolution will not be powered by Microsoft on The Next-Generation Secure Computing Base And will not star Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee Or Larry Lessig and Martha Stewart. Revolution will not promise penile enlargement. Revolution will not get rid of spam. Revolution will not earn you up to $5000 a month Working from home, because revolution is not An AOL Keyword, Brother. There will be no screen grabs of you and Jeeves the Butler one-click shopping at My Yahoo, Or outbidding a shady grandma on eBay for That refurbished iPod 20-gig. MSNBC.com will not predict election results in Florida Or fact-check the Drudge Report. Revolution is not an AOL Keyword. There will be no webcast of Wil Wheaton boxing Barney the Dinosaur on the dancefloor at DNA. There will be no mob- or wiki- blog of Richard Stallman Strolling through Redmond in a medieval robe and halo As St. iGNUcious of the Church of Emacs That he has been saving For just the proper occasion. Survivor, The Osbournes, and Joe Millionaire Will no longer be so damned relevant, and People will not care if Carrie hooks up again with Mr. Big on Sex and the City because Information Wants To Be Free even while Knowledge Is Power. Revolution is not an AOL Keyword.
There will be no final pictures from inside the World Trade Center in the instant replay. There will be no final pictures from inside the World Trade Center in the instant replay. There will be no RealVideo of 2600-reading, Linux-booting white hat hacktivists And Mickey Mouse in the public domain. The theme song will not be written by Jack Valenti or Hilary Rosen, nor sung by Metallica, Dr. Dre, Christina Aguilera, Matchbox 20, or Blink-182. Revolution is not an AOL Keyword. Revolution will not be right back after Pop-up ads about eCommerce, eTailers, or eContent. You will not have to worry about a Cookie in your browser, a bug in your email, or a Worm in your recycling bin. Revolution will not run faster with Intel inside. Revolution, dude, is not getting a Dell. Revolution will increase your Google rank. Revolution is not an AOL Keyword, is not an AOL Keyword, Is not an AOL Keyword, is not an AOL Keyword. Revolution will be no stream or download, dear Netizen; Revolution must still be live.
I dig it
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| musings of a sort.... |
[24 May 2006|09:58pm] |
life is not without peril, we all suffer hardships ...turmoil ...pain ....but adversity introduces a man to himself, a mans own self is his greatest friend... a mans own self is also his most daunting foe....perhaps our deepest fear is not that we are weak, vulnerable, or inadequate ...but perhaps our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond imagination. We are all meant to shine, it’s not just in some of us, it’s in all of us.We have sacrificed body and soul ...surrendered what we were, for what we can become....its boundless possibility which we embrace....born of imagination...nurtured by dreams...brought to life by a burning inner desire...its not what one is capable of that matters,..... its how much one wants something that counts....for there’s is no great reward without great sacrifice......
that being said,Im looking for some books....Im thinking that My O.T.O Fraters and Sorors may be able to help(Ive found all of them on amazon,so Im just looking for opinions advice recomendations etc)
Liber Koth Liber Hvhi LIBER AAPEP LIBER NEHEBKAU Liber Null Psychonaut Liber Kaos Book of the Witch Moon Choronzon Edition Three Books Of Occult Philosophy (Llewellyn's Sourcebook) The Practice of Magical Evocation Magick Without Tears The Book of the Sacred Magic of Abramelin the Mage Aleister Crowley's Illustrated Goetia: Sexual Evocation The Black Arts: An Absorbing Account of Witchcraft, Demonology, Astrology, and Other Mystical Practices Throughout the Ages Book of Black Magic and Ceremonial Magic Freedom Is a Two Edged Sword (Oriflamme Series) Uncle Setnakt's Essential Guide to the Left Hand Path Carnal Alchemy Hecate's Fountain Red Flame 1 The Poetry of Grady Louis McMurtry (Red Flame A Thelemic Research Journal, volume 1) The Unknown God: W.T. Smith and the Thelemites Theurgy, or the Hermetic Practice: A Treatise on Spiritual Alchemy (Paperback) sexuality,Magick and perversion The middle pillar strange angel The Complete Enochian Dictionary: A Dictionary of the Angelic Language As Revealed to Dr. John Dee and Edward Kelley
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| the cashier at the Circle K |
[28 Apr 2006|09:56pm] |
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mood |
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contemplative |
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music |
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Muddy Waters - champagne and reefer |
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.....is pretty damn cranky at the moment.....ya know,what teh hell happened to tardition?remembrance of the past?......anyone know who Bobby Sands is?anyone?....My point precisely!....this May 5th is the 25th aniversary of his (and others ) death from a hunger strike...for Irish freedom....I goto a SUPPOSEDLY Irish pub....and guess what theyre doing for May 5th?....cinco de friggin mayo....I wanted to break something...so after that,I get in a converstaion with people and mention Kent state....think anyone knew what I was talking about?course not...I guess Im just cranky,I get it in My head that things are important and apparently others dont feel the same....
so yeah,bug changes on the horizon....My job is wonderfull....about damn time I have a gig that I love...working at the Cave rocked,just wasnt very lucrative....its time for Possum to start climbing back up the mountain top....the past few years Ive been rolling down the rough side like homer simpson afetr he tried to jump the gorge....
something else thats been on My noggin as of late....I move to Dallas,and have yet to hang out with the folks that when I moved to Dallas I said "now we can actually hang out"....Ive been in a bit of hermit mode....have several theories as to why ,but nothing Im ready to expound upon.
I had an amazing time at Beltaine....lots of wounds were healed....fences mended,bridges built.....some new wounds were made....but more of the "cutting to bleed out the bad stuff" kind of thing....got to hang out with people i hadnt seen in forever ....and got to spend more time with Karliana than I have in a very long time.
also got to do some real Guardian stuff...hehehe....more than just patroling.
Im really worried about one of My Wyldlings....she hasnt checked in for over a month....and no way to get in contact with her......keep khia in yalls thoughts please.
Much love ....
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| Whats playing on the Circle K intercom |
[10 Apr 2006|01:54pm] |
Hate Me
I have to block out thoughts of you so I don’t lose my head They crawl in like a cockroach leaving babies in my bed Dropping little reels of tape to remind me that I’m alone Playing movies in my head that make a porno feel like home There's a burning in my pride, a nervous bleeding in my brain An ounce of peace is all I want for you. will you never call again? And will you never say that you love me just to put in my face? And will you never try to reach me? it is I that wanted space
Hate me today Hate me tomorrow Hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you
I’m sober now for 3 whole months it’s one accomplishment that you helped me with The one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing I won’t touch again In my sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight You never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicidal hate You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take So I’ll drive so fucking far away that I never cross your mind And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind
Hate me today Hate me tomorrow Hate me for all the things I didn’t do for you
Hate me in ways Yeah ways hard to swallow Hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you
And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made And like a baby boy I never was a man Until I saw your eyes cry and I held your face in my hand And then I fell down yelling “make it go away!” Just make a smile come back and shine just like it used to be And then she whispered “how can you do this to me?”
Hate me today Hate me tomorrow Hate me for all the things I didn’t do for you
Hate me in ways Yeah ways hard to swallow Hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you
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| musings at the Circle K |
[06 Apr 2006|01:45am] |
whether a kings palace , a nomadic encampment , a farmhouse in the country or even a tiny one room apartment,each of us spend a great deal of energy in carving out our own little kingdoms. From the grandest Castle to the smallest hovel,from the arrogance of the rich to the desires of the lowliest hood-rat,there is a basic need within the majority of us for ownership,or at least for stewardship.We want to...need to...find our place,our place in a world often too confusing and too overwhelming,our sense of order in one little corner of a world thats often too big and too uncontrollable.
and so we carve and line,fence and lock,then protect our space fiercely with force or deed or word.
The hope is, that this will be the end of that road we've chose to walk , the peaceful and secure rewards for a life of trials.Yet , it never comes to that ,for peace is not a place ,whether lined by hedges or highwalls.Beyond any physical securities there lies yet another form of unrest,one that neither king nor beggar will escape.All of us will,at times,be full of the unspeakable anger we sometimes feel.I dont mean a rage so great it cannot be verbalized but rather a frustration so elusive and so permeating that you simply cant find words for it.Its the quiet source of irrational outbursts against friends and family,true freedom from it cant be found anywhere but within ones own mind and soul.
These past few years have seen Me blown from place to place...My belongings scattered like leaves upon the wind....aliances made...friendships torn asunder...and old flames rekindled...and through it all ...the only constant was those that loved Me...TRULY loved Me....not just what they perceived Me to be...or what they wanted/needed Me to be...but the REAL Me.
yes,in the past few years I have called many places home...but in truth none of them were...."Home" for Me was shattered on a warm March day.Ever since then it seems Ive been constantly looking for My "place".
Eventually I found My place, and found that the place was within Me,not around Me.It happened when I let Mama and Papa and Hoot show Me how to defeat that unspeakable anger within.Only then could I start the path home.
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| *yawn* |
[15 Mar 2006|12:42pm] |
ok,so Im out of jail....thanks to good friends and the Gods I wasnt in as long as last time...speaking of,
Hoot could you email Me? I dont have your address anymore and REALLLLLY want to talk
ok,Im going to spend time with wee man....love to all...finger to some
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| an open letter to CMA |
[07 Mar 2006|09:24am] |
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mood |
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optimistic |
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music |
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Beatles - Why don't we do it in the road |
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WE are the center of the universe.
In each of our minds-some may call it arrogance, or selfishness-we are the center, and all the world moves about us, and for us, and because of us. This is the paradox of community, the one and the whole, the desires of the one often in direct conflict with the needs of the whole.
I don’t believe such thoughts are arrogant or selfish. It is simply a matter of perception; we can empathize with someone else, but we cannot truly see the world as another person sees it or judge events as they affect the mind and the heart of another, even a friend ...even someone we truly love.
But we must try. For the sake of the community, we must try. This is the true test of altruism, the most basic and undeniable ingredient of community. Therein lies the paradox, for ultimately, logically, we must each care more about ourselves than about others, and yet, if, as rational beings we follow that logical course, we place our needs and desires above the needs of our community, and then there is no community.
I have seen that way of selfishness. I have seen it fail miserably. When self-indulgence rules, then the whole community loses, and in the end, those striving for personal gain are left with nothing of real value.
Because everything of value that we will know in this life comes from our relationships with those around us. Because there is nothing material that measures against the intangibles of love and friendship.
Thus, we must overcome that selfishness and we must try; we must care. Emotions are a curious thing; they fly in the face of logic and overrule even the most basic instincts. Because, in the measure of time, in the measure of humanity, we sense those self-indulgent instincts to be a weakness, we sense that the needs of the community must outweigh the desires of the one. Only when we admit our failures and recognize our weaknesses can we rise above them.
Together
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| the wonders of Southern Comfort |
[03 Mar 2006|01:11pm] |
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music |
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eminem-without Me |
] |
....I re-discovered the joys of tore-uppedness....Let the Marsupial God be re-born!!!
on a somewhat similar note...eminems song "without Me" makes sooo much more sense these days
and for Zathras...."the austro-hungarian empire was famous for FUCK ALL!!...they collapsed like a flan in cupboard"
little red cookbook!!little red cookbook!!little red cookbook!!
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| wanted to share |
[16 Feb 2006|11:25am] |
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Every time Chuck Norris smiles it saves the life of a dying man. Ironically, Chuck Norris only smiles after he kills someone. They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.
Chuck Norris appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch, " Norris replied, "That's no glitch."
At birth, Chuck Norris came out feet first so he could roundhouse kick the doctor in the face. Nobody delivers Chuck Norris but Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.
When Chuck Norris was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay: "What is Courage?" Chuck Norris received an "A+" for writing only the words "Chuck Norris" and promptly turning in the paper.
Chuck Norris' hand is the only hand that can beat a royal flush.
Superman owns a pair of Chuck Norris pajamas.
The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris's fist.
Chuck Norris has a word for a person he puts into a coma; that word is "lucky".
Chuck Norris clogs the toilet even when he pisses.
Cars were invented to have a faster way of fleeing from Chuck Norris. Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris invented the car accident.
Chuck Norris can eat soup with a fork.
Achilles was supposedly the greatest warrior of all time, but he died because of his weak spot, the Achilles tendon. There is no Chuck Norris tendon.
Similar to a Russian Nesting Doll, if you were to break Chuck Norris open you would find another Chuck Norris inside, only smaller and angrier.
Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg.
Oxygen requires Chuck Norris to live.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.
Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.
Chuck Norris always has sex on the first date. Always.
Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris likes to knit sweaters in his free time. And by "knit", I mean "kick", and by "sweaters", I mean "babies".
As a teen Chuck Norris impregnated every nun in a convent tucked away in the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later the nuns gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in professional football history.
A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a fucking Indian.
Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.
If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the fuck down.
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
At birth, Chuck Norris came out feet first so he could roundhouse kick the doctor in the face. Nobody delivers Chuck Norris but Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can blow bubbles with beef jerky.
They had to edit the first ending of 'Lone Wolf McQuade' after Chuck Norris kicked David Carradine's ass, then proceeded to barbecue and eat him.
Chuck Norris does, in fact, live in a round house.
Chuck Norris can skeletize a cow in two minutes.
Chuck Norris never has to wax his skis because they're always slick with blood.
When you say "no one's perfect", Chuck Norris takes this as a personal insult.
Chuck Norris can win a game of Trivial Pursuit with one roll of the dice, and without answering a single question... just a nod of the head, and a stroke of the beard.
If you work in an office with Chuck Norris, don't ask him for his three-hole-punch.
The First rule of Chuck Norris is: you do not talk about Chuck Norris.
Aliens DO indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Chuck Norris is on.
Chuck Norris went looking for a bar but couldnt find one. He walked to a vacant lot and sat there. Sure enough within an hour and a half someone constructed a bar around him. He then ordered a shot, drank it, and then burned the place to the ground. Chuck Norris yelled over the roar of the flames, always leave things the way you found em!
When Arnold says the line "I'll be back" in the first Terminator movie it is implied that is he going to ask Chuck Norris for help.
There are no such things as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.
For Spring Break '05, Chuck Norris drove to Madagascar, riding a chariot pulled by two electric eels.
After returning from World War 2 unscathed, Bob Dole was congratulated by Chuck Norris with a handshake. The rest is history.
In the movie "The Matrix", Chuck Norris is the Matrix. If you pay close attention in the green "falling code" scenes, you can make out the faint texture of his beard.
They say curiosity killed the cat. This is false. Chuck Norris killed the cat. Every single one of them.
Chuck Norris crossed the road. No one has ever dared question his motives.
Chuck Norris can kick through all 6 degrees of separation, hitting anyone, anywhere, in the face, at any time.
Most people know that Descartes said, "I think, therefore I am." What most people don't know is that that quote continues, "...afraid of Chuck Norris."
For every movie about Vietnam starring Chuck Norris, the historical duration of the war decreases. Just 3 more "Missing in Action" sequels, and that war will have never actually existed.
If a tree falls in the forest, does anybody hear? Yes. Chuck Norris hears it. Chuck Norris can hear everything. Chuck Norris can hear the shrieking terror in your soul.
The best part of waking up, is not Folgers in your cup, but knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep.
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| something Ive learned.. |
[30 Jan 2006|09:03am] |
Pain never goes away...pain,like energy,just changes forms
Hurt never stops...just changes speed
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| In the immortal words of Eddie...."so.....yeah." |
[23 Jan 2006|01:16pm] |
welllllll,ya know...in 1962,while eating hallucinegenic mushrooms....in BURRRRRRMA....sorry...had to get that out of Me system...hehehe...
For the remainder of this post,narration will be done by God...also known as James Mason.
been in a weird place as of late,not bad weird,just kinda like Im at the mall and have no idea where I parked kinda weird,but on a grander metaphysical scale...
The Canvas shows coming up and I already have My ensemble together and will be attending with the entourage...looking equally sexy and sinfull...Looking forward to seeing everyone I usually only get to see once or twice a year...like zathras,bren,jason,knot and the rest of the Canvas-ites.
SOO,its come to My attention that I may be abnormal in some respects..."WHAT!?!" I hear you exclaiming dear poppetts ...but alas its true...I alienated Myself at work last night when I decided that for the rest of the night I would be Lucious Malfoy,you know,like I do.. and refer to most people as muggle born or filthy little mudbloods etc...and do all the HP spells ad nauseum (I.E.:"accio !" "aqua menti" "sectum sempra!!") all with My boxcutter as a makeshift wand...turns out not one person I work with has read harry potter and only one had seen any of the movies....*le sigh*...dont even get Me started bout when I asked about Eddie Izzard.....yeah...didnt go over well.
Had an interview yesterday that Im SOOOOOOOO hoping I get ...itd be a M-F thing and more human hours...and its white collar to boot!So everyone think positive.
My love to most of you ....My finger to the rest
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| ya know.... |
[17 Jan 2006|09:10am] |
eating a container of jalapeno flavored pimento cheese will make ya think....
last night they played the song "wind beneathe My wings" and I thought of everyone whos been that for Me(I always do when they play that song)...and it occured to Me that there are people out there who might not realize I feel that way about them....two of the top ones being hoot and mirabour....hoot knows why and mirabour,well she doesent need to know WHY ,just that she is......
now to finish off the sweet pickles ...maybe have a few moonpies for desert.
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| the circle K is in need of zoning |
[17 Jan 2006|09:06am] |
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had a really odd dream about zathras....he worked for NBC...not sure in what capacity,but the weird part was that for some reason it concerned Me that he did....weirdness
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